Don’t Let Rejection Rob You Blind

Rejection isn’t just an emotion we feel. It’s a message that’s sent to the core of who we are, causing us to believe lies about ourselves, others, and God.

#UninvitedBook @LysaTerKeurst

This simple quote above by Lysa about rejection. I so get it.

I’ve experienced the type of rejection that not only makes you feel you aren’t enough, but makes you believe you aren’t enough.

For months after experiencing a painful rejection, I literally felt overcome with worthlessness. I listened to every lie the enemy told me, and not only let his lies take up residence in my mind, but also let them take up residence in my heart. What lives in our heart and our mind will be reflected in the way we live our life overall. It’s hard to live a life of joy, peace and hope when the anchor of rejection keeps pulling you deeper and deeper into the darkness.

And in the dark, we’re blind. Blinded to Whose we are, because we’re focused on who we think we aren’t.

Lysa’s latest book, Uninvited, came at the perfect time. A time when I so desperately needed to be reminded of where my worth was founded. Not in myself or in the acceptance of others,  but in Christ alone. I loved what she shared in Chapter 11 regarding the ten things we must remember when we’re feeling rejected. In this chapter, Lysa wrote,

“The enemy loves to take our rejection and twist it into raw, irrational fear that God really doesn’t have a good plan for us. This fear is a corrupting companion. It replaces the truths we’ve trusted with hopeless lies. Satan knows what consumes us controls us. Therefore the more consumed we are with rejection, the more he can control our emotions, our thinking, and our actions.”

I hate to confess this, but this quote sums how I spent was too many months. I knew God loved me, but I wasn’t feeling – much less living – loved. I knew He saw value in me, but I couldn’t see it in myself. I knew I could have peace in Him, but the dustcloud of lies in my head kept pushing peace farther and farther away. I knew He was in control and that His Word promises hope for the future, but I let fears overwhelm me.

You see, I allowed my feelings to become all consuming, and eventually, all controlling.  And maybe you’ve done that too. But when we become consumed with our negative emotions which are entangled with the lies of rejection, we tend to forget who we are in Christ, much less that He has a good plan for us. We lose sight of the fact we are valued, loved and treasured, simply because of the words or actions from someone whose approval and acceptance we desperately wanted. We become blinded to anything positive, because we’re laser focused on the negative.

You see, rejection is a thief. Rejection is a peace stealer. Rejection is a joy stealer. Rejection is a hope stealer.  Rejection can rob us blind.

But you know what? We all have the power to decide whether or not we allow the enemy to be a thief in our lives. We have God’s power residing in us to fight back against anything the enemy tries to take away – including our self confidence, joy, hope and peace. Satan holds no power to break in and loot our hearts and minds, unless we sling open the door and give him permission to roam.  Lysa’s words in her new book became a salve to my soul just when I needed it most. It helped me shut the door on the enemy and stop letting him wreak havoc in my heart.

If you’ve ever struggled with feeling rejected, hurt or betrayed, whether it’s from the hurtful actions of a parent, a child, a boss, a friend, a church member, or a spouse, then my heart goes out to you. Rejection is no fun, and sometimes becomes a true test of faith. But sweet friend, it is possible to start climbing out of that emotional pit. If I can do it, so can you. (Insert me giving you a warm hug here) Smiles. 🙂

Below are the ten tips Lysa shared in Chapter 11 that we can remember when rejection strikes. Each section spoke peace and healing back into my heart, so much so, that I can’t possibly narrow down which tip I like most!  So I have tried to engrave each of these in my memory so I can call upon God’s truths when the enemy tries to break in and start stealing again.

  1. One rejection is not a projection of future failures
  2. Rejection doesn’t label you, it enables you to adjust and move on
  3. This could be an invitation to live in expectation of something else
  4. there is usually some element of protection wrapped in every rejection
  5. It’s good to ask the “what” questions but less helpful to ask “why”
  6. Don’t hash, bash, or trash on the internet. Remember the internet never forgets
  7. There’s much more to you than the part that was rejected
  8. What one person sees as your liability, another might see as a wonderful asset
  9. This is a short term setback, not a permanent condition
  10. Don’t let this heartbreak destroy you. Let this breaking actually be the making of you. Let God use it in good ways to make you stronger and take you further.

In Lysa’s words, “the devil is vicious but he is not victorious”.  Unless we let him be, of course. I refuse to let him be victorious in my life anymore – what about you?

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Enter to win a free copy of Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left out and Lonely!

If you’ve ever struggled, or are currently struggling, with the heavy burden of emotions due to rejection, leave a comment on this blog post sharing which one of these 10 tips speaks most to you (0r you can pick more than one, if you’re like me!). Then commit to tuck that tip into your heart from this day forward!

 

 

 

 

 

** The winner of Monday’s giveaway for the Uninvited t-shirt is Christine who was notified via email. Book winner will be announced next week.**

 

 

19 Comments

  1. Cherie on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:16 am

    All I can say is “thank you thank you thank you”



  2. Suzette Buffa on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:20 am

    Insightful spirit filled words. It’s funny that we (*I*) can tell them to others, but I certainly can’t always believe it in my core. Thank you so much for the chance to win this book and thank you also for your ministry!



  3. Jill on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:21 am

    Rejection digs a hole. Sometimes we jump right in and decide to stay a while. Thank you for inspiration to climb on out and believe God rather than others.



  4. Ramie on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:26 am

    Wow..just Wow! Such insight for a young woman. Thank you for sharing.



  5. Sandy on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:30 am

    I’m tucking #10 in my heart. For 11 years now I have been crippled by the heartbreak of my husband’s passing. Time to move on.



  6. Sharnea Johnson on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:46 am

    It’s good to ask the “what” questions but less helpful to ask “why”.

    So many times I’ve been tempted to ask “why”, knowing that the answer could possibly hurt more than the act itself. I will remember going forward that the “why” is not important, mainly because we are human and as such there are too many variables. We cannot control anyone other than ourselves. I however will ask ” what” and I will find contentment in those answers.



  7. K. Goodfellow on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:56 am

    #10 – this can make you stronger.
    God certainly used the rejection of the past to make me closer & stronger woman of God. I choose to remember this always .



  8. Tami on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 8:58 am

    Rejection doesn’t label you, it enables you to adjust and move on!!! I know this in my mind, but my heart wants to reconnect and heal the brokenness. The loneliness almost paralyzes me from moving forward. I would love a copy of Lysa’s book! Thank you, Tracie your words sank deep in my sole.



  9. Dennette S. on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 10:06 am

    “Don’t let this heartbreak destroy you. Let this breaking actually be the making of you. Let God use it in good ways to make you stronger and take you further.”
    Wow, these words really do say it all, this struck with me the most.



  10. Tammy on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 10:15 am

     Rejection doesn’t label you, it enables you to adjust and move on



  11. Darlene Dunlap on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 10:23 am

    Rejection is awful and puts you in a dark place where Saran keeps messing with you. I have felt rejection from many close people in my life. I’m still trying to look at Jesus and know I am worthy. Thank you for this post it touches a special place. God bless



  12. Debbie Yates on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 10:34 am

    This could be an invitation to live in expectation of something else
    there is usually some element of protection wrapped in every rejection.
    These are the 2 statements that mean the most to me. I sometimes feel overwhelmed by the rejection I’ve experienced. My husband left me for my best friend. Several years later my daughter who I was very close to chose to go live with her dad and stepmother and she has only been back home for Christmas. I’ve lost 2 jobs in a span of 4 months. I see God protecting me with my exhusband’s rejection. I believe God is calling me to start a home for unwed mothers. So losing my job is an invitation. However, I don’t see how my daughter’s rejection can be good. I’d really love to have this book so that I can move past the hurt I feel and do all that God is calling me to do.



  13. Melissa Henderson on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 11:58 am

    I am participating in the P31 Online Bible Study for “Uninvited” and it is wonderful. 🙂



  14. Joy Marsh on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 1:09 pm

    I know what rejection is all about. After being married for almost 31 years, my husband decided that he wanted to be with someone younger than our oldest daughter. I felt rejected, used and such a failure. But, God had other things in mind for me. He sent a godly man in my life who loves me with all his heart and we celebrated our 16th anniversary this year. God I’d so good!!



  15. Jen E. on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 3:52 pm

    I feel emotionally rejected by my dad as I deal with chronic widespread pain and other health and personal issues. I find tip number 10 the most helpful.



  16. Beth Erickson on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 4:17 pm

    Number two. I struggle with some of these..but I’m learning struggling is not a Place, it’s a journey. I’d love a copy of the book to do a study of it with my granddaughter, who is feeling helpless.



  17. Dara on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 4:18 pm

    “What one person sees as your liability, another might see as a wonderful asset” is my favorite because it’s a reminder that just because some people may only see my disability and the things I can’t do, God, and also my friends, see my potential.



  18. Sharon C. on Friday, September 30, 2016 at 11:29 pm

    You talked about rejection in your blog . I was watching Lysa talking to her home church taped on You Tube. She was talking about rejection from her dad at a early age. She tried everything to get him to notice her at age 8. I had a similar problem with rejection. Coming from an abusive dysfunctional family that I learned rejection early. Being the middle child was even harder. My dad was extremely hard on my older sister so my mom was always trying to protect her. My dad worshiped my baby sister so there was no one left for me. Feeling rejected comes easy to me. If you start out that young your in a mindset of always feeling no one cares. Then you become addicted to eating chocolate as a comfort food and gain weight. The weight gain adds to more rejection. It just continues on and on. You hang with the wrong people, marry the wrong person and make wrong decisions in life. You can trust your judgements. I’m glad Lysa tacked this subject. If just one person can see their self in a different light and that they are a worthy person that God made and loves. I hope that person will be me. Thanks. Sharon



  19. Linda on Saturday, October 1, 2016 at 11:27 pm

    I just received my copy of uninvited and cannot wait to read it. I would love to win another copy to give to friends. Number 4 of the tips really resonated with me “there is usually some element of protection wrapped in every rejection”. It so hard to remember that God’s plans are so much better for me than anything that I can think up. It’s very easy to get frustrated, angry and/or discouraged when I feel rejected but if I can remember this tip and the others discussed than perhaps I can find peace and comfort in the rejection as I wait to see what God has planned for me!



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Tracie Miles is a bestselling author and the Director of COMPEL Training with Proverbs 31 Ministries.  She helps women grow stronger in their faith, pursue the life of purpose God designed them for and live a life of peace, joy and happiness despite their circumstances.

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