I had been feeling a little distant from my husband lately, and made sure to tell him how we had not spent anytime together lately and that I wanted our relationship to be a priority. I reviewed how many weeks it had been since we had had a date night or alone time, and his answer was simply this: “I’ve been right here.”
My eyes were opened. At that moment, I realized he was right. I started thinking about the past few weeks and realized how busy I had been. I had spent a weekend in Virginia at a speaking event, had spent many hours and days over the past few weeks with my sister in the hospital, had been mommy to my own kids plus her two kids, and then spent five days at She Speaks. I had been absent a lot, without really even taking inventory of my absence.
Today I received an email from one of the ladies that was in my She Speaks speaker evaluation group. She sweetly wrote that God had laid me on her heart, and given her a bible verse to share with me. The verse was Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
Although I felt so blessed that God had taken time to lay little ‘ol me on someone else’s heart, I found myself worrying about why He had given her that verse to share with me. I started thinking, “Lord, have I not been serving you enough lately? Don’t you remember how hard I worked for you over the 5 days of She Speaks…. oh yeah, and what about all those speaking events I have had this year, spreading your love and encouraging women to draw closer to you? Have I had a negative attitude? Do I look or act weary in my service to you?”
I began fretting over my inabilities and insecurities, and wondering how I had let God down. Keeping in mind, that I knew there were plenty of examples that God could come up with! So I did the only thing I could do – pray! I asked God to let me know what it was He was trying to say to me through this precious new sister in Christ.
Then He laid the answer on my heart…..my first ministry is to my family. I need not get weary being the devoted wife and mom that He has called me to be. I need not get weary devoting my time to my sister who needs special care and attention right now after surgery. I need not grow weary doing double duty as a mom, loving on and caring for her two children while she is recovering. I need not grow emotionally weary, worrying about my loved ones and their future. I need not grow weary taxiing my kids from place to place, doing housework, etc., etc., etc. God called me to minister to my family, through my every day responsibilities, and honestly, I do consider them a privilege. God wants me to a light for Him in my home, not just for everyone else. LOVE being a mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend – and I need to remember that every day – even when things make me feel a little weary!